People who are powerful but uncharismatic will tend to be disliked.

  • Their power makes them a target for criticism that they don't have the charisma to disarm

Having conviction in your ideas and beliefs is the heart of charisma.

  • It is the belief that things will work out.  That somehow, someway your goals will be achieved.  That no matter what, it will all be okay. 

Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are.

Ask yourself these two questions when you get feedback that says you need to change:

  • Have I gotten this feedback consistently?
  • Are people getting an impression of me that does not align with my values?

If two yes's, change. If not, stick to your guns

Someone with real charisma:

  • respects that other people have different opinions
  • Does not seek other’s approval to make a decision or hold an opinion
  • Is confident that they will meet other people who will agree with them

Charismatic people reveal their flaws

Charismatic people let you know when they’re nervous, pissed, or hurt

Charismatic people don’t worry about fitting in.  They just express themselves honestly, flaws and all

Keep your messages uplifting and positive and people will be drawn to you

Make the subtext of your jokes point to positive traits (“Does it hurt having a brain so big?” is nicer than “God you’re a moron.”)  Whether the tone is serious or goofy, always frame others in the best light possible.

If you want to instantly enthrall people, give a damn about something. Show that passion.

People who have had to struggle for what they’ve got are more likeable